A lot has happened in the last three years and I am only human. It's to be expected that there would be some things that I would forget. I'm sure I'll remember how to hold a teeny baby. I hope I'll remember how to cope with sleep deprivation. I definitely didn't remember how hard it is not telling people that we're expecting.
Last time around we employed every trick in the book. Every white lie from food poisoning, hangovers, long weekends ahead, anything to throw people off the scent of our impending joy. We didn't want to announce anything until after the first scan*. We wanted to make sure, to see it for our own eyes before we told the world. We also wanted to tell the grandparents before our friends.
This time around our feelings are the same, we're keeping mum until after the first scan. The difference is, this time we have been lying for much longer. We didn't really have any pressure with number one, apart from years of laughing off hints from eager grannies-to-be. This time around everybody has been asking when we're going to go for number two.
Friends, family, neighbours, the postman. You name it everybody seems to have a vested interest in when we are planning to extend our family unit. To start with I was happy with telling everybody that I'd forgotten what it was that I was meant to do! Having a baby can squish the libido out of a relationship. Then I started telling people that we were "enjoying the practice" of making a baby. But when we had been actively trying to have a baby every question was a reminder that we were failing as parents to be.
We should find out next week when our dating scan is. Until then we're going to keep our heads down and continue the subterfuge. We haven't even told number one just in case he lets slip at nursery. Life will be so much easier once the cat is out of the bag. I don't like fibbing and planning in private but that's just what I'll have to do...don't tell anyone!
*also known as the dating scan
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